1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,120
You know the kind of guy
who does nothing but bad things...

2
00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:07,080
and then wonders why
his life sucks?

3
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:11,240
Well, that was me. Every time
somethin' good happened to me...

4
00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:13,680
somethin' bad was always waitin'
around the corner.

5
00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:17,040
Karma.

6
00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:19,320
That's when I realized
I had to change.

7
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:23,080
So I made a list
of everything bad I've ever done...

8
00:00:23,160 --> 00:00:26,000
and, one by one,
I'm gonna make up for all my mistakes.

9
00:00:26,120 --> 00:00:28,000
I'm just tryin' to be
a better person.

10
00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:30,600
My name is Earl.

11
00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:34,960
[ Earl Narrating ] It was nice to see Joy
so happy to be with her kids.

12
00:00:35,040 --> 00:00:36,960
That's because they were
leavin' her alone for a week...

13
00:00:37,040 --> 00:00:39,320
goin' with Crab Man
to stay at his mom 's.

14
00:00:39,440 --> 00:00:41,880
Thank you, babies.
You boys leavin' for a whole week...

15
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:45,000
is the best Mother's Day gift
a mom could ask for.

16
00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:47,280
Here's some extra spending money.
Can you empty it out now?

17
00:00:47,360 --> 00:00:50,160
I need the jar for Mr. Turtle
so I don't have to buy him a seat on the bus.

18
00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:53,280
Oh, yeah. Here you go.

19
00:00:55,040 --> 00:00:56,880
Bye, boys.

20
00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,000
We promise not to call, Mommy.

21
00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:01,480
Oh, wouldn't answer if you did.

22
00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:03,880
[Earl Narrating]
Turns out Joy's idea of a great Mother's Day...

23
00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:05,800
was havin'a week
of not bein'a mother.

24
00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:09,280
And who could blame her?
Being a mom is hard.

25
00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:11,760
Who the hell thinks it's all right
to put Mr. Turtle in the toilet?

26
00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:14,920
Who the hell thinks it's okay to paint
a peanut-butter-and-jelly mural on my wall?

27
00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:16,840
Who the hell-

28
00:01:16,920 --> 00:01:18,960
[ Gagging ]

29
00:01:22,360 --> 00:01:25,200
Damn it. Who keeps putting
Mr. Turtle in the toilet?

30
00:01:26,840 --> 00:01:29,800
- I didn't know it was
Mother's Day tomorrow. Did you?
- No, I forgot.

31
00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:31,920
You gonna do somethin'
for your mom, Catalina?

32
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,640
- My mother is dead.
- I'm sorry.

33
00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:37,040
Oh, it's okay.
It was either her or me.

34
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:40,880
[Earl Narrating]
I felt bad we forgot about Mother's Day...

35
00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:45,160
'cause this wasn't the first time we had
to scramble at the last minute to get a gift.

36
00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:48,160
Back when we were kids,
all we had to do was wait for someone...

37
00:01:48,280 --> 00:01:51,000
smaller, weaker and more prepared
for Mother's Day.

38
00:01:51,120 --> 00:01:53,280
- Let go of me!
- We knew we'd find somethin' good...

39
00:01:53,400 --> 00:01:56,240
'cause Kenny's backpack was the same place
we did our Christmas shoppin'.

40
00:01:57,360 --> 00:02:00,720
[ Gasps ]
Oh. Did you wrap this?

41
00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:05,520
It's so pretty. I hate to tear it up.
Let's save that for another day.

42
00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:08,920
[ Gasps ]
Oh, my.

43
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:11,120
Oh, Carl, look what the boys made.

44
00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:13,200
It's a little coupon book.

45
00:02:13,280 --> 00:02:17,560
"Clean the house for Mom.
Do the dishes for Mom.

46
00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:19,480
Breakfast in bed for Mom."

47
00:02:19,600 --> 00:02:22,480
Oh. You know, I'm gonna use
this one right now. [ Giggles ]

48
00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:31,320
I like marmalade on my toast.

49
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:35,080
[Earl Narrating]
Stolen coupons sure made Mom happy...

50
00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:38,440
until she realized we'd never
let her cash any of'em in.

51
00:02:38,560 --> 00:02:41,400
- Those little jerks aren't comin' back, are they?
- Nope.

52
00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:50,160
- What are you doin'?
- I'm puttin' Mom on the list.

53
00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:53,960
[ Sighs ] Number 266-
never gave Mom a good Mother's Day.

54
00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:58,040
Can I write this one, Earl?
I wanna practice cursive again.

55
00:02:58,160 --> 00:03:01,440
If you do something for your mom,
won't you have to see your dad?

56
00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:03,360
- I thought he hates you.
- He does.

57
00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:05,800
But I won't have to deal with Dad.
Tomorrow's all about Mom.

58
00:03:05,920 --> 00:03:08,920
[Earl Narrating] Meanwhile,Joy was
preparing to enjoy her Mother's Day.

59
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:11,320
Here. Just keep bringing me drinks.

60
00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:14,960
But make sure I have enough money to grab
myself a Kit Kat and chalupa on the way home.

61
00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:17,440
[Earl Narrating] The next morning,
we snuck into my parents' house...

62
00:03:17,560 --> 00:03:21,200
to surprise Mom with
a Mother's Day breakfast in bed.

63
00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:27,200
- [ Rattling ]
- Shh!

64
00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:30,440
What we didn't know at the time
was my parents heard someone breakin' in...

65
00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:33,600
and Dad was tryin' to remember
the combination to his gun safe.

66
00:03:33,720 --> 00:03:36,960
- Try your birthday again.
- I already tried my birthday, Kay.

67
00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:38,880
When's our anniversary?

68
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,800
- You don't know our anniversary?
- [ Sighs ]

69
00:03:40,920 --> 00:03:43,680
This is exactly what I meant the other day
when I was talkin' about...

70
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,120
how you live in this Carl bubble,
and the rest of the world-

71
00:03:46,240 --> 00:03:49,560
Now, Kay? Really?
We're gonna do this now?

72
00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:51,480
- May 3.
- Oh.

73
00:03:51,560 --> 00:03:55,720
- [ Clattering ]
- No. When's your birthday?

74
00:03:57,920 --> 00:03:59,960
[ Whispering ]
I can't wait to see her face.

75
00:04:01,240 --> 00:04:04,520
- [ Screams ]
- Happy Mother- [ Groans ]

76
00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:06,440
- [Dishes Shatter]
- Oh.

77
00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,440
- Hey, Randy.
- Hey, Dad.

78
00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:14,080
[Earl Narrating] After we explained we were
there to give Mom a good Mother's Day...

79
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:17,600
- she was thrilled.
- Look what I found.

80
00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:19,600
I can't believe you still have this.

81
00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:21,520
These coupons are,
like, 20 years old.

82
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:25,840
"Participate in Hands Across
America with Mom. "

83
00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:29,680
[Earl Narrating] And so we spent the day
doin' what we should've done a long time ago-

84
00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:32,320
Let Mom cash in all her coupons.

85
00:04:32,400 --> 00:04:35,320
Like "Plant flowers with Mom. "

86
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,840
Hey, look, Earl.
Somebody buried a pair of shoes.

87
00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:41,440
- Randy, hold on-
- Yuck! It's a cat skeleton.

88
00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:44,960
I should name him Crackers after our cat
that used to sleep in the street.

89
00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:47,280
[Earl Narrating]
"Take a portrait with Mom. "

90
00:04:48,400 --> 00:04:52,160
[Shutter Clicking]

91
00:04:52,240 --> 00:04:55,520
We even did the coupons that seemed
a little strange now that we were adults.

92
00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:57,680
Like "Take a bath without bein' asked. "

93
00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:00,240
This is fun, Earl.
I miss bein' a kid.

94
00:05:00,360 --> 00:05:03,600
You sure there's not room in there
for both of us if you just kind of move over-

95
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,600
I'm sure, Randy.

96
00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:09,920
[ Projector Whirring ]

97
00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:11,840
[Earl Narrating]
Our day was goin' great.

98
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:15,280
And so far, I had managed
to avoid dealin' with Dad-

99
00:05:15,400 --> 00:05:18,600
until Mom cashed in her
"Watch home movies" coupon.

100
00:05:18,680 --> 00:05:20,640
Hey, Earl, it's that ramp
you built for our bikes.

101
00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:24,480
Out of the leaf from
my mahogany dining table.

102
00:05:24,560 --> 00:05:26,560
Aw.

103
00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:28,520
Oh, look. Thanksgiving.

104
00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:31,120
- Oh, I should've gotten a smaller bird.
- [ Sighs ]

105
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:33,480
Look. There's that
old car that you bought.

106
00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,880
[ Carl Chuckles ]
Look at me smiling.

107
00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,480
I had absolutely no idea
that my 11-year-old son...

108
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:41,920
would drive that car into the lake
only two months later.

109
00:05:42,040 --> 00:05:45,600
Oh, watching these movies,
it just amazes me...

110
00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:48,560
how you always had a way
of ruining everything.

111
00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:51,240
Dad, I didn't ruin everything, okay?

112
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:55,720
And that was the end
of our home movies.

113
00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:59,840
Come on, Dad. We're just tryin'
to have a good time here.

114
00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:02,960
I'm sorry, Mom.
I wanted this to be a perfect day.

115
00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:05,840
I just- I just wish
you two could get along.

116
00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:09,360
You know what you should do? You should
do somethin' on that list for your father.

117
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:12,320
- Yeah, I- Mom, I've tried to. He-
- Well, try again.

118
00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:18,040
You know what? I've got one coupon left,
Earl, and it says "Mother's choice."

119
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:22,320
Which means that I get to pick whatever I want,
and I want you to do something for your dad.

120
00:06:22,440 --> 00:06:24,680
Mom, Dad hates me.

121
00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:27,800
- Oh, hate's a strong word.
- Kay, I remembered the combination-

122
00:06:27,920 --> 00:06:30,880
3-14-89. It's the day
Earl moved out.

123
00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:45,640
How about number 42- cut holes in all
of Dad's shirts to show his nipples.

124
00:06:45,760 --> 00:06:50,800
No, his nipples have drooped down like six
inches, so that one kind of crosses itself off.

125
00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:54,760
- Now I wait.
- How long do you have to wait?

126
00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:57,520
- [Traps Snapping]
- Not long.

127
00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:02,120
All right, we gotta do one of these.
I promised Mom.

128
00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:05,480
How about number 108-
lost Dad's Mustang.

129
00:07:07,600 --> 00:07:11,120
He was pretty mad when he saw it
in that home movie today.

130
00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,480
Maybe I should do that one.

131
00:07:13,560 --> 00:07:16,720
[Earl Narrating] But that car
didn't have to be dragged out of a lake...

132
00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:18,760
like I told my dad
all those years ago.

133
00:07:18,880 --> 00:07:22,120
- I lost it another way.
- [ Pounding ]

134
00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:25,320
[ Revs ]

135
00:07:28,520 --> 00:07:31,520
- Is that thing fast?
- You bet your ass it's fast.

136
00:07:31,640 --> 00:07:34,440
Fastest car in Camden County.

137
00:07:34,520 --> 00:07:37,440
- Bet my dad's Mustang's faster.
- [ Scoffs ]

138
00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:39,680
We've never seen him drive it,
but he says it's really fast.

139
00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:41,600
Yeah, little man?

140
00:07:41,720 --> 00:07:44,360
You wanna put your money
where your little mouth is, huh?

141
00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:49,120
Race for pink slips?
Huh? Huh? You scared?

142
00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:52,120
You better be,
'cause I'm Billy Reed.

143
00:07:52,240 --> 00:07:54,560
You know how many girls
I've had sex with?

144
00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:58,320
Four.

145
00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:02,200
[Earl Narrating] That day I learned
I had trouble backin'down from a challenge.

146
00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:04,880
Come on, Randy.
Let's go get Dad's car.

147
00:08:04,960 --> 00:08:07,560
See you at the drag strip, peewee.

148
00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:11,120
Who was the fourth girl?

149
00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:15,680
I counted Tricia twice 'cause I got her
with and without her back brace on.

150
00:08:15,800 --> 00:08:17,760
[ Cheering ]

151
00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:21,200
[Earl Narrating] Less than an hour later,
I was about to have my first drag race ever.

152
00:08:21,320 --> 00:08:25,280
Whoo! Jackie! Kick his ass, brother!

153
00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:27,200
You shouldn't smoke.

154
00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:31,280
We watched a cartoon at school where
an owl told us that it was really bad for you.

155
00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:33,720
It killed the owl's father
at the end of the cartoon.

156
00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:36,160
Do I look like a damn owl to you?

157
00:08:37,920 --> 00:08:39,560
Okay, Patty, we're ready!

158
00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:43,280
- [ Engine Revving ]
- You ready, peewee?

159
00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,120
Let's do this.

160
00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:49,600
- [ Tires Squealing ]
- [ Cheering]

161
00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:56,200
[Earl Narrating]
As fast as that Mustang might've been...

162
00:08:56,280 --> 00:08:58,640
it didn't change the fact
that at 11 years old...

163
00:08:58,720 --> 00:09:01,680
I didn't know how
to get out of first gear.

164
00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:05,560
- [ Grunts ]
- [ Gears Grinding ]

165
00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:08,880
At the time, the thought of my dad
confronting Billy was humiliating...

166
00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,640
so I lied and told him
I drove his car into a lake.

167
00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:13,640
But now it was time to get it back.

168
00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:22,720
Earl Hickey. All growed up.

169
00:09:22,840 --> 00:09:26,080
Yeah, listen, I need to get that Mustang back.
How much do you want for it?

170
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:29,600
[ Scoffs ]
I don't sell cars- I race 'em.

171
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:31,800
We race 'em. Whoo!

172
00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:34,840
Jack- [ Coughing ]
Jackie!

173
00:09:34,920 --> 00:09:36,880
[ Coughing Continues ]

174
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:41,640
That's just how that owl's dad
coughed in the cartoon...

175
00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:44,000
before he fell out of the air
and broke his neck.

176
00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:45,920
He's lucky he's not flying.

177
00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:50,280
That's a sweet El Camino
you rode up in.

178
00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:52,800
You want that Mustang back,
I'll give you a rematch.

179
00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:56,160
The 'Stang verses your Camino.
Mano "Y" mano.

180
00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:58,080
I don't want to race, Billy.

181
00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:00,640
Besides, the Mustang looks like
it hasn't been started in years.

182
00:10:00,760 --> 00:10:04,320
Hey, Earl, there's a long,
skinny dog lyin'down in the backseat.

183
00:10:04,440 --> 00:10:06,880
Oh, wait. He's standing up.
He just doesn't have any legs.

184
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:10,040
Maybe it's a snake.
Do snakes have hair?

185
00:10:10,120 --> 00:10:12,800
They do when they're ferrets. You scared?

186
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:18,080
Is that it, growed up Earl?
You scared I'll take another car off you? Huh?

187
00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:22,040
You scared? You should be,
'cause I'm Billy Reed.

188
00:10:22,120 --> 00:10:26,040
[ Chuckles ]
You know how many girls I've had sex with?

189
00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:27,960
Five.

190
00:10:28,040 --> 00:10:32,080
Randy, get in the car.
We'll see you at the drag strip.

191
00:10:32,160 --> 00:10:37,080
Ed, put the tires on the Mustang,
get that hairy snake out of the backseat.

192
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:40,920
- We got ourselves a race.
- [ Cheering ]

193
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:44,680
[Earl Narrating] Less than an hourlater,
I was about to have my second drag race ever.

194
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:47,280
And with her kids still out of town,
Joy hadn't stopped partying.

195
00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:50,040
[ Slurred ]
Hey, dummy.

196
00:10:50,120 --> 00:10:54,560
I heard y'all was out here racin',
so I fit it in to my Mother's Day week schedule.

197
00:10:54,680 --> 00:10:58,000
This is so the police don't know
I'm out here drinkin'.

198
00:10:58,120 --> 00:11:00,320
[ Kisses ]

199
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:05,080
- [Engine Starts ]
- Let's do this!

200
00:11:05,160 --> 00:11:08,200
[Earl Narrating] And although the cars
hada lot of miles on 'em by now...

201
00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:10,880
- Patty had even more.
- All right, let's get this show on the road!

202
00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,920
I got an appointment with a guy
who likes to suck on my feet.

203
00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:16,840
First car to pass the blue mailbox wins!
Let's do this!

204
00:11:16,960 --> 00:11:19,040
Whoo, Jackie!

205
00:11:19,160 --> 00:11:21,280
Whoo! Who's Jackie?

206
00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:23,520
[ Shouts ]

207
00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:28,760
[ Cheering ]

208
00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:37,560
[Earl Narrating] We were neck and neck
until we got both cars up to about 30.

209
00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:39,960
- [ Engines Sputter ]
- Then they quit on us.

210
00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,600
Oh!

211
00:11:44,520 --> 00:11:46,960
[ Backfires ]

212
00:11:47,080 --> 00:11:50,040
Ed! Get up here and push!

213
00:11:50,120 --> 00:11:54,040
- Go, Ed! go!
- Randy, come on and push! Come on!

214
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,480
- Go, Ed!
- [Earl] So the race turned out to be...

215
00:11:57,600 --> 00:12:00,360
less about horsepower
and more about brotherpower.

216
00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:03,280
- Come on, Randy! You can do it!
- Come on, Ed!

217
00:12:03,400 --> 00:12:06,720
- Push!
- [ Coughing ]

218
00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:08,680
You got it, Randy!
We're almost there!

219
00:12:08,800 --> 00:12:11,120
[ Coughing Continues ]

220
00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:16,120
- I told you to give up those cigarettes, Ed!
- [ Coughing Continues ]

221
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,680
- [ Cheering ]
- [Earl Narrating] And I had more brotherpower.

222
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:23,280
- We did it, Randy!
- [ Panting ]

223
00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:25,720
Yeah, Randy!

224
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:28,120
I won, Billy! The car is mine.

225
00:12:28,240 --> 00:12:32,360
Fine. You get the car.
But it was a close race. I still got my dignity.

226
00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:37,080
Hey, Billy! Is it okay if I cancel
your appointment to suck my feet?

227
00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:39,400
I'm just not feelin' it anymore.

228
00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:46,400
[Earl Narrating] After over 20 years of lyin'
to my dad about what happened to his car...

229
00:12:46,520 --> 00:12:49,000
it was time to tell him the truth.

230
00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:55,480
It's not Mother's Day anymore, Earl.
Come back next year.

231
00:12:55,600 --> 00:12:58,760
No, w-w-wait, Dad.
I 'm here for you. Look.

232
00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:01,320
I didn't lose your car in a lake.

233
00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:03,680
I lost it in a race,
but I just won it back.

234
00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:05,680
Now I can cross you off
my list like Mom wanted.

235
00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:08,080
- My car?
- Yeah, your Mustang.

236
00:13:08,160 --> 00:13:11,920
Idiot, that car wasn't for me. That was
going to be your car when you turned 16.

237
00:13:12,040 --> 00:13:14,480
- What?
- Yep.

238
00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:17,840
So I guess I'm not the one
who should be on that list.

239
00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:21,800
"Lost my own car
because I'm an idiot."

240
00:13:28,640 --> 00:13:31,920
I can't believe I lost my own car.

241
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:36,240
Hey, look at this one, number 67-
ran over Crackers.

242
00:13:36,320 --> 00:13:39,040
Hey, what kind of crackers
did you run over, saltines?

243
00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:41,160
I bet it made a crunchy sound.

244
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:48,120
[Earl Narrating] Findin' out the car
I lost was supposed to be for me...

245
00:13:48,240 --> 00:13:50,360
put me in a situation
I'd never faced before.

246
00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:53,000
I'm on my own list.
What the hell am I supposed to do about this?

247
00:13:53,120 --> 00:13:55,280
Can't you just forgive yourself
and cross it off?

248
00:13:55,360 --> 00:14:00,000
I don't want to forgive myself. My life would've
been a lot better if I had that Mustang.

249
00:14:00,080 --> 00:14:02,320
I wouldn't have lost
my virginity in a public bus.

250
00:14:02,400 --> 00:14:04,760
And I wouldn't have had to watch.

251
00:14:04,880 --> 00:14:07,440
[Slurred]
Hey, dummies.

252
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:12,600
What, are you guys- Probably sittin' here
sayin' stupid stuff? Doin' stupid stuff?

253
00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:15,440
[ Laughing ]

254
00:14:19,760 --> 00:14:21,560
I'm gonna fix up that car.

255
00:14:21,680 --> 00:14:23,440
- Really?
- Yeah. Why shouldn't I?

256
00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:25,800
Everybody else on the list
makes me do somethin' for them.

257
00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:29,480
Why should I be any different?
I'm gonna pay myself back.

258
00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:31,480
Come on, Randy.

259
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:38,840
Hey. Hold on.
I'm gonna come too. Hold on.

260
00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:45,200
- Maybe you should drive her home.
- I don't know. She might be okay.

261
00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:50,280
Damn it. Who threw
their drink at me?

262
00:14:50,360 --> 00:14:52,760
I'll drive her home.

263
00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:55,280
[Earl Narrating]
So while Randy got Joy home safe...

264
00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:59,280
I went to my parents' house to fix up the car
that should've been mine 20 years ago.

265
00:15:00,560 --> 00:15:02,680
What the hell are you doing?

266
00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:05,000
Mom said I could fix the car here.

267
00:15:05,080 --> 00:15:07,720
I can't work on a car at the motel.

268
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:10,120
Every time you slide under,
somebody tries to steal your shoes.

269
00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:13,480
- I told you I don't want the car.
- I'm not doin' this for you.

270
00:15:13,560 --> 00:15:16,560
I-I-I lost myself a car.
I owe myself a car.

271
00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:19,320
- I'm doin' this for me.
- Yeah, well, fixin' a car is a lot of work.

272
00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:22,680
So let me know when you give up,
and I'll call the junkyard.

273
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:25,840
[Earl Narrating]
It was gonna be hard work.

274
00:15:25,920 --> 00:15:29,640
But this was the list,
so quittin' wasn't an option.

275
00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:33,560
See? I told you. I drove just fine.

276
00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:36,880
Oh, I drove. You were steering with
a paper plate in the passenger seat...

277
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:39,440
but you did get
a couple of the turns right.

278
00:15:41,720 --> 00:15:44,560
Randy, do you wanna
spend the night tonight?

279
00:15:44,680 --> 00:15:46,920
[Earl Narrating]
It was an odd request.

280
00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:49,960
Randy had never thought
of Joy in that way.

281
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,120
I'm lonely, Randy.

282
00:15:52,240 --> 00:15:54,520
I don't think I can go a whole week.

283
00:15:57,040 --> 00:15:59,160
[Earl Narrating] So that night,
Randy gave her what she needed.

284
00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,080
[ Banging ]

285
00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,240
And much to Randy's surprise...

286
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:07,160
the next morning when Joy was sober,
she was hungry for more.

287
00:16:07,280 --> 00:16:09,120
So much more that
they didn't even notice...

288
00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:11,080
when Darnell and the kids
came home early.

289
00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:13,000
Joy?

290
00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:16,200
Hey, boys! Welcome home!

291
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:19,160
Cool. A sheet fort.

292
00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:21,120
- [ Together ] Cool!
- Come get in!

293
00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:25,080
[ Earl Narrating ] You see, what Joy
couldn't go a week without was her kids.

294
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:29,640
Randy playing with that toy plane made her
realize how much she missed bein' a mom.

295
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:36,120
How much she missed someone innocent
around to liven up the house.

296
00:16:41,120 --> 00:16:44,360
Someone who needed her
to take care of him.

297
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:46,360
Someone to have fun with.

298
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:50,600
Because no matter how far she sent
her boys away, she was still a mom.

299
00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:53,680
There was no forgettin' it.
And she didn't want to.

300
00:16:55,200 --> 00:16:58,360
And the next morning, I was still
making headway on the Mustang.

301
00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:00,800
At least I thought I was.

302
00:17:05,160 --> 00:17:07,600
You're putting a 1970 carburetor on a '65?

303
00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:09,360
- It'll fit.
- Oh, sure, it'll fit.

304
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:12,160
That size four dress'll fit your mother,
but I wouldn't take her out in it.

305
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,960
That's a matching numbers car there.

306
00:17:14,080 --> 00:17:17,400
Well, it's gonna have to work
'cause it's all I have.

307
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:30,680
Where is this from?

308
00:17:30,760 --> 00:17:33,280
1965. Just put it on there.

309
00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:38,000
Go on.

310
00:17:38,120 --> 00:17:40,800
That's it. That's it. Easy.

311
00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:45,240
No, no, no, no. You gotta hold it down even
soyou don't cross the threads.

312
00:17:45,320 --> 00:17:50,640
Go to the cabinet, get the throttle plate.
We're gonna need that next.

313
00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:52,640
Go. You know what a throttle plate
looks like, don't you?

314
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:55,080
[ Grunts ]

315
00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:59,600
[Earl Narrating] When I saw all those Mustang
parts my father bought over 20 years ago...

316
00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:03,120
I realized this wasn't just a car
my dad had planned on givin' me.

317
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:06,080
It was a car he had planned on
us rebuildin' together.

318
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:08,040
[ Ratchet Clicking ]

319
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:11,760
So that's what we did.

320
00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:15,000
Over the next couple days,
we got talkin' less about car parts...

321
00:18:15,080 --> 00:18:18,200
- and more about other things.
- So I was supposed to be named Carl?

322
00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:20,360
Yep, after me.

323
00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:22,400
But on your birth certificate-

324
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:25,320
I 've always sucked at cursive,
so I put an extra loop on the "C."

325
00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:29,200
So the "C" looked like an "E,"
and here you are- Earl Hickey.

326
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:32,400
[Earl Narrating] And before I knew it,
I was havin' somethin' with my dad...

327
00:18:32,520 --> 00:18:34,640
I never had before- a conversation.

328
00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:38,640
And we kept on havin' 'em for the next
two weeks, until the car was finished.

329
00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:43,880
- Looks great, huh?
- It sure does.

330
00:18:43,960 --> 00:18:45,800
[ Earl Narrating]
And then it came to me.

331
00:18:45,880 --> 00:18:49,640
What I had cheated myself out of,
all those years ago, wasn't a car.

332
00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:52,840
It was a chance to have some
quality time with my dad.

333
00:18:52,960 --> 00:18:56,760
And now that I got that,
I could cross myself off my list.

334
00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,120
[ Sighs ]

335
00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:09,360
Well, here you go.

336
00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:13,800
Now, the paint's not totally dry...

337
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:16,520
so don't let Randy slide across the hood
like he always wants to.

338
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:20,480
Hmm.

339
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,400
Maybe I should just keep it here.

340
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:25,360
Here? Why would you want to do that?

341
00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:29,280
Well, the motel's no place
to store a nice car like this.

342
00:19:29,360 --> 00:19:31,920
Plus, you'd get to drive it too.

343
00:19:38,400 --> 00:19:40,880
- Let's go take her for a ride.
- Mm-hmm.

344
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,440
[Earl Narrating]
Some people might think...

345
00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:46,440
that leavin' that car with my dad
was an unselfish act.

346
00:19:46,560 --> 00:19:48,520
But I wasn't doin' it for him.

347
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:51,640
That car was the first good memory
my dad and I had together...

348
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:53,920
and I didn't want him to forget it.

349
00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:05,120
[ Sighs ]

350
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:07,360
What the hell?

351
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:10,200
- Somebody put a damn snake-dog back here!
- [ Ferret Chittering]

352
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:12,120
- Don't touch the ferret, Patty!
- [ Shouting ]

353
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:14,480
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Patty, don't touch the ferret!

998
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:22,800
Montaje: Redención
Subtítulos: dahhny

999
00:20:24,491 --> 00:20:29,800
.: tusseries & subXpacio :.