1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:05,160
You know the kind of guy
who does nothing but bad things...

2
00:00:05,240 --> 00:00:07,120
and then wonders why
his life sucks?

3
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:11,280
Well, that was me. Every time
somethin' good happened to me...

4
00:00:11,360 --> 00:00:13,720
somethin' bad was always waitin'
around the corner.

5
00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:17,040
Karma.

6
00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,360
That's when I realized
I had to change.

7
00:00:20,720 --> 00:00:23,120
So I made a list
of everything bad I've ever done...

8
00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:26,040
and, one by one,
I'm gonna make up for all my mistakes.

9
00:00:26,160 --> 00:00:28,040
I'm just tryin' to be
a better person.

10
00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:30,600
My name is Earl.

11
00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:33,080
[ Earl Narrating ]
Ever since I made my list...

12
00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:35,080
and got us
out of the stealin' business...

13
00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:36,760
Randy doesn't have
an income anymore.

14
00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:39,520
Can I have more money
for the claw machine?

15
00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,960
You're the one who told me
to go after Kermit.

16
00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:44,880
He's got those skinny legs.
He's not a cheap Muppet to claw.

17
00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:50,440
Hey, dummy.
One of your little butt buddies...

18
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:52,720
Hank Lange,
made it in the newspaper.

19
00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:55,960
Jackass tried to rob
a liquor store with a crossbow.

20
00:00:57,680 --> 00:01:00,640
"Jackass tries to rob a liquor
store with a crossbow. "

21
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:03,960
- Wow, I didn't think you could
say "jackass" in the newspaper.
- World's changin', Earl.

22
00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,360
You'd be surprised what
those asswipes in the media get away with.

23
00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:09,720
There's a picture of the douche bag
on the bottom. Shot himself in the arm.

24
00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:11,720
Ow, that's gotta hurt.

25
00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:15,440
Twenty years? They're sendin' him
to state prison for 20 years.

26
00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:19,080
Long stretch. But at least he'll be able
to spend some quality time with his daddy.

27
00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:22,000
[Earl Narrating]
As bad as I felt for Hank, I had my own problem.

28
00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:23,960
Hank was on my list.

29
00:01:24,080 --> 00:01:27,560
Number 18- told an inappropriate story
at Hank Lange's birthday party.

30
00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:30,640
So I said, "Well, if you have to tinkle,
just do it in the ocean."

31
00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:35,360
He walked to the edge of the water, dropped
his tiny trunks and whizzed into the ocean.

32
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:38,320
- [ All Laugh ]
- I got a story about Hank.

33
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,200
It was Steve Coco's
bachelor party.

34
00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:45,800
And like all bachelor parties,
there was some entertainment.

35
00:01:45,880 --> 00:01:48,680
- Uh, Earl, maybe- maybe this isn't the best time.
- No, no, no.

36
00:01:48,760 --> 00:01:50,920
Come on. Don't worry,
I won't tell the bad part.

37
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,520
So Hank goes into the bathroom
with this stripper...

38
00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:55,800
and then, uh, you know,
some stuff happens.

39
00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:58,080
Anyway,
Hank comes out...

40
00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:01,800
about 10 minutes later with his tongue
down this stripper's throat...

41
00:02:01,880 --> 00:02:04,760
tellin' her how she's gonna
be his wife, and then...

42
00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:07,200
all of a sudden,
somebody said to Hank...

43
00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:12,640
"I think she'd make a better
husband 'cause she's a dude!"

44
00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:15,480
[ Laughs ]

45
00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:19,800
[Earl]
Whoo! Whoo!

46
00:02:19,920 --> 00:02:21,800
[ Laughs ]

47
00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:26,920
If I wanna cross him off my list
before they send him to state prison...

48
00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,800
- I gotta do it by Friday.
- Can I have another quarter?

49
00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:33,120
I only got one, and I wanna listen to Skynyrd
while I eat my crab cakes.

50
00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:36,880
- Can I have a quarter?
- I know your beggin' ass did
not just ask me for a quarter.

51
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:40,320
- Hey, Darnell,
do you have a quarter I can borrow?
- I think so.

52
00:02:40,440 --> 00:02:44,360
Yeah, he's got a quarter. You know why he's
got a quarter? He's got a damn job. That's why.

53
00:02:44,480 --> 00:02:48,680
I don't have a quarter. Just three nickels
and a super-sour gummy worm. Sorry.

54
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:51,960
When is your lazy ass gonna stop
mooching off your brother and get a job?

55
00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:56,440
You're damn near 30 years old. You need to
start acting like an adult like the rest of us.

56
00:02:56,560 --> 00:03:00,440
Darnell, don't you go off with my gummy worm!
You took it out of my trick-or-treatin' bucket!

57
00:03:00,640 --> 00:03:04,400
One time me and Hank polished off four
bottles of Cherry Mad Dog and swore that...

58
00:03:04,520 --> 00:03:08,480
if one of us ever got put away for hard time,
the other one would break him out.

59
00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:11,080
I hope he doesn't
remember that, Randy.

60
00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:13,000
- Should I get a job?
- What?

61
00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:16,680
Joy said I should get a job so you don't
have to support me anymore.

62
00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:18,880
You know, pay for my food
and Muppets and what not.

63
00:03:19,000 --> 00:03:21,360
- I don't mind supportin' you.
- Okay.

64
00:03:22,720 --> 00:03:25,440
Although, I mean,
uh, it wouldn't hurt to get a job...

65
00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:27,360
if you, uh-
if you wanted to.

66
00:03:27,440 --> 00:03:30,760
- So should I get a job?
- I don't know.

67
00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:34,280
We got the lotto money to live on,
but that's only gonna get us so far.

68
00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:36,960
I don't mind supportin' you, but I don't
wanna run out of money...

69
00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:38,880
before I can cross
everything off my list.

70
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,960
I really think
it's my purpose in life.

71
00:03:41,080 --> 00:03:43,120
- Then I'm gonna get a job.
- Really?

72
00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,920
Yeah. I want you to be able
to do the things on your list.

73
00:03:46,040 --> 00:03:49,280
And, you know, who knows, maybe it is time
for me to find my purpose.

74
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:51,560
I think that's a really
good idea, Randy.

75
00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:53,880
A purpose is a great thing
to have.

76
00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:56,000
It gives you a reason
to wake up every morning.

77
00:03:56,120 --> 00:04:00,080
- So a purpose is like a box
of powdered doughnut holes?
- Exactly.

78
00:04:02,880 --> 00:04:06,560
- You here to break me out?
- You remember that, huh?

79
00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:09,440
Yeah, but don't worry about it.
I'm cool inside here.

80
00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:12,640
- Hey, Randy.
- I'm gettin' a job.

81
00:04:12,720 --> 00:04:17,920
Good for you. So, what's up?
You here just for a visit?

82
00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:21,040
Well, uh, actually I have something
I need to talk to you about.

83
00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:23,040
See, I've got this list.

84
00:04:30,840 --> 00:04:34,120
- Hello.
- Hey, my wife didn't show up. You wanna chat?

85
00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:36,400
Sure.
What's your name?

86
00:04:36,520 --> 00:04:39,680
I wanna cross you off the list,
but I just don't know what to do.

87
00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:41,640
All right, how about this?

88
00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:46,440
Since you gave me a bad day, give me
one good day before I get transferred upstate.

89
00:04:46,560 --> 00:04:48,640
That seems fair.
What do you want me to do?

90
00:04:48,720 --> 00:04:52,520
Bring my grandma in for a visit.
She can't drive.

91
00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:56,720
And bring a copy of my hometown newspaper
so she can read it to me.

92
00:04:56,840 --> 00:04:59,600
That day's copy.
Gibtown Journal.

93
00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:02,800
You can get it from my uncle.
He gets it in the mail.

94
00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:06,600
And bring some doughnuts.
From Yummy's. Fresh ones.

95
00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:08,560
All right,
so, uh, Grandma...

96
00:05:08,680 --> 00:05:12,680
uh, Gibtown Journal from your uncle
and Yummy's doughnuts.

97
00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:14,760
Done.

98
00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:16,680
Have you tried
talkin' to him?

99
00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:20,080
Maybe if you just explained you're not a gay,
he'd find someone else.

100
00:05:20,200 --> 00:05:22,120
No, I tried that.

101
00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:27,040
My wife was gonna put a razor in
her mouth and pass it to me when
we made out during our conjugal.

102
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,440
- Got anything sharp on you?
- Just my toe nails.

103
00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:31,760
But I won't put 'em in my mouth.
They're dirty.

104
00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:35,760
You know what? I think I'm just gonna
close my eyes and power through it.

105
00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:38,800
Yeah. I think that's
your only choice.

106
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:49,400
- Good luck on your job search.
- Thanks.

107
00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:01,480
[Earl Narrating] Since visiting hours
at the jail were over at noon...

108
00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:04,880
I'd have to wait until the next day
to give Hank his good day.

109
00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:09,200
Here's one. It says, "Dancers wanted."
I love to dance.

110
00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:13,280
That's Club Chubby, Randy. They're looking
for strippers. I used to work there.

111
00:06:15,920 --> 00:06:17,960
- You think I could be a pilot?
- Keep readin'.

112
00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:21,840
Hey, Randy, if you're lookin'
for a job, we need a bus boy.

113
00:06:21,920 --> 00:06:24,240
The old guy took a bad spill
in the men's room.

114
00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:27,880
Thanks, Darnell, but I was gonna try and find
a job where I wouldn't slip in pee-pee.

115
00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:29,600
Okay.
Good luck with that.

116
00:06:32,040 --> 00:06:36,680
Here's a good one. "Make your own hours.
No experience necessary."

117
00:06:36,760 --> 00:06:38,560
No experience.
You got a lot of that.

118
00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:42,640
It's sellin', uh,
cleanin' supplies door-to-door.

119
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,560
Sounds cool.

120
00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:48,960
Um, "not only makin' money,
but makin' the world a brighter place."

121
00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:51,920
This could be my purpose, Earl.
I'm gonna call.

122
00:06:54,640 --> 00:06:56,560
How long did you work
at Club Chubby?

123
00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:58,800
- About a month.
- You make good money?

124
00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:13,160
I'm guessin' that's a yes.

125
00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:15,080
[ Beeping ]

126
00:07:16,920 --> 00:07:20,640
[Earl Narrating] The next day, I got up
bright and early to give Hank his good day.

127
00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:22,960
Since Hank's grandma lived
on the way to the jail house...

128
00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:24,880
and Hank wanted
his doughnuts fresh...

129
00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:28,720
I figured the smart thing to do was go by
his uncle 's and get the newspaper first.

130
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:32,400
So, I just, uh, need your newspaper,
uh, if- if you don't mind.

131
00:07:32,480 --> 00:07:35,720
I don't mind, but it's in my mailbox
down in the lobby.

132
00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,480
- Should we go get it?
- If you wanna carry me down the stairs.

133
00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:40,840
Well, we'll take
the elevator.

134
00:07:40,920 --> 00:07:43,600
I don't trust elevators.
They break, fall and paralyze people.

135
00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,880
That's crazy.
Elevators are perfectly safe.

136
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,280
I mean,
they're not just gonna-

137
00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,960
Oh, wow.
[ Chuckles ]

138
00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:57,120
"Bar-ba-dos."
That's- That's, uh-

139
00:07:57,240 --> 00:08:00,200
[Earl Narrating] Hank's uncle
didn't trust me with his mailbox key...

140
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:02,880
me being a friend
of his criminal nephew and all.

141
00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:05,480
So gettin' the newspaper turned
out to be harder than I thought.

142
00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:08,880
Meanwhile, Randy was off
at his first day ofwork.

143
00:08:08,960 --> 00:08:11,560
Rather than startin' out goin'
door-to-door with strangers...

144
00:08:11,640 --> 00:08:14,760
he decided to get warmed up
with people he knew.

145
00:08:14,840 --> 00:08:17,760
- What?
- "Hello, ma'am.

146
00:08:17,880 --> 00:08:21,400
" How would you like to end your
daily fight with stubborn stains?

147
00:08:21,520 --> 00:08:23,600
"Half circle.
Remember to maintain eye contact.

148
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:25,560
Half circle."

149
00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:28,960
[ Earl Grunts ]

150
00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:32,960
I gotta poop.

151
00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:35,320
- But, we're almost halfway down.
- I gotta poop!

152
00:08:43,920 --> 00:08:45,800
You obviously
do a fine job cleaning.

153
00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:47,840
Gesture room.

154
00:08:47,960 --> 00:08:50,960
But the Bright Time Cleanin' System could
make your job easier and save you time.

155
00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:53,600
Time that you could be using
to bake a casserole...

156
00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:55,600
or have tea with
your lady friends.

157
00:08:55,720 --> 00:08:59,600
So, you think that one bottle
can clean that whole window?

158
00:08:59,680 --> 00:09:03,400
"This one bottle could clean
all the windows in your home...

159
00:09:03,520 --> 00:09:05,320
slash apartment,
slash trailer."

160
00:09:05,440 --> 00:09:07,760
Now this I gotta see.

161
00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:16,960
Tell Hank I said hello.

162
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:22,040
Actually, I don't think I'm gonna make it
down there to see him today.

163
00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:24,040
Visiting hours
are over at noon.

164
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:26,040
I have to get
an earlier start tomorrow.

165
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:29,400
And try to get your business done before
we make it halfway down the stairs.

166
00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:33,200
I'll see what I can do.
I'm not exactly runnin' the show.

167
00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:42,840
Ma'am, would you like the deluxe,
the mini deluxe or the basic deluxe package?

168
00:09:42,920 --> 00:09:45,880
Sorry, honey, but we're
just a little bit tight on cash right now.

169
00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:49,360
We usually steal our cleaning supplies from
the gas station bathroom down the street.

170
00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:51,560
Oh.

171
00:09:51,680 --> 00:09:53,600
Well, that makes sense.

172
00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:57,720
- Thanks anyway.
- Congratulations on the new job.

173
00:09:58,880 --> 00:10:00,720
Dumb-ass.

174
00:10:00,800 --> 00:10:04,160
[Earl Narrating] I felt bad that Randy
was havin'trouble finding his purpose in life...

175
00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:06,520
but I was wakin' up
to my own problems.

176
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:10,720
- [ Beeping ]
- 8:00 a.m. is early for a guy like me. Real early.

177
00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:14,320
But I wanted to make sure I got to Hank's
uncle's in time to get everything done.

178
00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:23,200
[ Earl Narrating ]
And by the time I got to Yummy's...

179
00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:25,840
- I was right on schedule.
- [ Rings Bell]

180
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:31,760
Didi? I didn't know
you worked here.

181
00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:33,840
You son of a bitch!

182
00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:38,400
I told my parents we were
getting married!

183
00:10:40,520 --> 00:10:43,800
[Earl Narrating] While I was tryin'to figure out
how I was gonna get those doughnuts...

184
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:46,320
Randy was seein' if a new profession
might be his purpose.

185
00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,840
This is Mr. Parker.
You're gonna prep him for surgery.

186
00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:50,840
I never shaved
a man's face before.

187
00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:52,960
I saw Footloose's wife
do it in that movie...

188
00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:55,440
where the cool Sweathog could
break mirrors with his brains.

189
00:10:55,560 --> 00:10:57,840
It looked easy-
the shaving the Sweathog's face...

190
00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:59,760
not the breakin'
mirrors with your brains.

191
00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:01,880
I think they did that
with trick photography.

192
00:11:01,960 --> 00:11:05,200
You're not shaving his face.
Mr. Parker's having a vasectomy.

193
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,840
I'm out.

194
00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:12,440
Hank, I've been tryin' to get someone to buy me
doughnuts for the last two hours.

195
00:11:12,520 --> 00:11:15,640
People think I'm crazy.
Do they have to be from Yummy's?

196
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:17,600
[ Sighs ]
Okay. All right.

197
00:11:17,680 --> 00:11:20,440
No, I hear ya.
Nah, I said I hear ya.

198
00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:46,160
[Phone Ringing]

199
00:12:14,960 --> 00:12:17,520
[Earl Narrating] With the doughnuts
in hand, all I had to do was...

200
00:12:17,640 --> 00:12:19,880
pick up Grandma
and get to the jail by noon.

201
00:12:20,000 --> 00:12:22,280
Damn it.

202
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:30,200
I 'm just gonna have to get
an earlier start tomorrow, that's all.

203
00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:32,120
- Hey, Earl.
- Hey, Crab Man.

204
00:12:32,240 --> 00:12:36,600
Here's a good one, Earl.
"Join the exciting world of science research."

205
00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:38,760
Science, Earl. Do you think that
could be my purpose?

206
00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:42,640
I don't know, Randy. Maybe your purpose
is stickin' with a job for more than one day.

207
00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:46,840
Do you think when I find my purpose I'll get
some sort of sign, like a glowing light?

208
00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:50,000
But not like an alien abduction glowing light,
like a Jesus light?

209
00:12:50,120 --> 00:12:54,000
- I don't know, Randy. I doubt it.
- Hi, Mr. Clean. Where you been?

210
00:12:54,120 --> 00:12:56,480
Promised my neighbor
you'd clean her trailer.

211
00:12:56,560 --> 00:12:58,480
Oh, it turns out
that's not my purpose.

212
00:12:58,560 --> 00:13:02,680
I'm gonna work in "the ever-changin'
landscape of cosmetic testin'."

213
00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:04,600
Cosmetics?
[ Laughs ]

214
00:13:04,720 --> 00:13:08,040
There ain't enough cosmetics in the world
to cover your dumb-lookin' face. [ Laughs ]

215
00:13:08,120 --> 00:13:11,440
Seriously. If they send you free testers,
you better hook me up.

216
00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:16,280
[ Beeping ]

217
00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:19,240
[Earl Narrating]
7:00 a.m. is early fora guy like me.

218
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:22,000
But sometimes you have to do
what you have to do.

219
00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:25,680
[ Grunting ]

220
00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:29,320
[ Ringing ]

221
00:13:37,560 --> 00:13:40,760
As it turned out, much like everything else
on this little chore...

222
00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:43,200
pickin'up Hank's grandma
wasn't easy.

223
00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,160
I drove around for an hour
before I found a parking spot.

224
00:13:57,600 --> 00:13:59,440
[ Earl Narrating ]
As disappointed as I was with my day...

225
00:13:59,520 --> 00:14:02,920
Randy was more disappointed
with his new career in science.

226
00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:06,920
- Ready to get started?
- I guess.

227
00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:15,920
You can go home now. Be sure to call us
as soon as you get your sight back.

228
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:19,120
- Thank you, Doctor.
- [ Chuckles ] Oh, I'm no doctor.

229
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:21,680
Hey, Darren, this guy just
called me "Doctor."

230
00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:23,920
Oh!

231
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,320
I don't think I like the exciting world
of science anymore.

232
00:14:27,440 --> 00:14:29,560
It's not fun bein' blind.

233
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:31,560
Why is Steven Wonder
always smilin'?

234
00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:35,880
Maybe he can't see that he's smilin'.
Am I smilin', Earl?

235
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:40,560
- No, Randy. You're not smilin'.
- Hey, Earl, could you hand me the want ads?

236
00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:45,520
I'm gonna find another job.

237
00:14:51,160 --> 00:14:54,240
- Hey, Earl, could you read this for me?
- No, I'm not gonna read to ya.

238
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:57,880
I gotta get up at the crack of dawn.
I got my own problems I'm dealin' with.

239
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,800
At least you have
your sight.

240
00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:03,000
Randy, you were gonna get a job
so you could be more independent.

241
00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:06,120
But so far I've had to give you money for
cleanin' supplies, play doctor with you...

242
00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:09,080
and after dinner, I'm literally gonna
have to help you use the bathroom.

243
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:13,000
You don't have to hold anything.
Just get me on the seat. I'll go like a girl.

244
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:17,000
Randy, why don't you just take the job
as a busboy at the Crab Shack?

245
00:15:18,040 --> 00:15:20,120
I don't wanna be
a busboy, Earl.

246
00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:23,080
I want somethin'cool, like you have
with your list. I want a purpose.

247
00:15:23,160 --> 00:15:25,720
Well, maybe not everybody
has a purpose.

248
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:28,080
But at least they contribute
and pull their own weight.

249
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:32,720
If you really wanna help, stop trying to do
these crazy jobs, and just go be a busboy.

250
00:15:34,080 --> 00:15:36,560
Fine.
I'll be a busboy.

251
00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:38,560
[Earl]
Good.

252
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:49,600
Who's there?
Who's there?

253
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:53,320
[ Beeping ]

254
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:55,800
[Earl Narrating]
6:00 a.m. is early for a guy like me.

255
00:15:55,880 --> 00:15:59,960
But I was determined that today would be
the day that I gave Hank his good day.

256
00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:12,640
[ Ringing ]

257
00:16:31,840 --> 00:16:33,640
All right, let's get goin'.
Hank is waitin'.

258
00:16:33,760 --> 00:16:35,760
- Okey dokey.
- Oh, hey, you have to take her drops.

259
00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:38,800
- What?
- Her eye drops. You have to put drops...

260
00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:43,000
in her eyes every 10 minutes or they'll dry out
and the lids will stick to the balls.

261
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:45,800
You don't wanna see that.
Her watch has a timer on it to remind you.

262
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:47,800
[Man]
No, you did it again. Wrong one.

263
00:16:47,920 --> 00:16:51,120
- Oh, and, uh, she hates it, so good luck.
- [Door Closes ]

264
00:16:52,960 --> 00:16:54,760
[Watch Beeping]

265
00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:57,640
- Does that mean it's time for your drops?
- No.

266
00:16:57,760 --> 00:17:01,280
- I think that means it's time for your drops.
- No, it doesn't.

267
00:17:03,840 --> 00:17:06,560
Come on. I gotta
give you your drops, or you'll dry up.

268
00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:09,000
- I don't like 'em.
- I know. Just give me your head.

269
00:17:09,120 --> 00:17:11,200
- I don't wanna.
- Give me your head.

270
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:13,600
- No!
- You're gonna make me wrestle you, aren't you?

271
00:17:13,680 --> 00:17:16,160
Yes.

272
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:18,160
All right.
Let's do this.

273
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:19,840
[ Both Grunting ]

274
00:17:19,920 --> 00:17:21,760
- No!
- Come on!

275
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,280
- No! I told you, I can't!
-Just relax! It'll be easy.

276
00:17:24,360 --> 00:17:27,360
- No!
- Come on now. [ Grunts ]

277
00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:29,800
- It's just gonna take a second.
- Stop it!

278
00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:37,440
- Thanks.
- No problem.

279
00:17:38,720 --> 00:17:40,960
Damn it.

280
00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:43,520
- Hey, Earl.
- Hey, Crab Man.

281
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:45,640
- So, how was your first day?
- Fine, I guess.

282
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:49,200
I made some money. And who knows,
maybe this is my purpose in life.

283
00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:53,520
I am helpin' people. They can't eat if other
people's plates are still on their table.

284
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:56,760
I mean, they can, but it would be crowded
and kinda gross. Hey.

285
00:17:56,840 --> 00:18:00,040
Maybe my purpose in life is to make
things less crowded and less gross.

286
00:18:00,160 --> 00:18:02,240
- Hmm.
- How was prison?

287
00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:04,440
Didn't get there.
Gonna try again tomorrow.

288
00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:06,920
I got the day off.
Can I hang out with you?

289
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:10,000
- Sure, but we're gonna have to get up real early.
- How early?

290
00:18:10,160 --> 00:18:12,360
[ Beeping ]

291
00:18:12,440 --> 00:18:14,320
[ Grunts ]

292
00:18:17,360 --> 00:18:19,760
[ Snoring ]

293
00:18:19,880 --> 00:18:22,080
Perky, perky,
hands off jerky.

294
00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:24,320
Poopie trim.

295
00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:26,920
[ Grunting ]

296
00:19:01,840 --> 00:19:05,120
Get off me! No!
Let go, you big ape!

297
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:11,160
It's only 6:30 a.m.
Visiting hours don't even start until 8:00.

298
00:19:11,280 --> 00:19:13,320
Why'd we have to
get up so early?

299
00:19:13,440 --> 00:19:17,000
Because what took me four days
to try and get done without you...

300
00:19:17,120 --> 00:19:19,760
- only took an hour and a half with you.
- I'm sorry.

301
00:19:19,880 --> 00:19:22,200
No, Randy,
it means I need you.

302
00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:26,080
- You do?
- Yeah. I shouldn't have told you to take that job.

303
00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:28,360
If I'm gonna cross off
all the stuff on my list...

304
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:30,440
I'm gonna need you with me,
not workin' as a busboy.

305
00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:32,400
- Really?
- Yeah. Think about it.

306
00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:36,000
You were with me when I did most
of the things on this list.

307
00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:38,960
Maybe you're supposed to be
with me when I fix 'em.

308
00:19:39,080 --> 00:19:42,520
The list is my purpose, but I think
you being there to help me is yours.

309
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:46,480
I sure like that a lot better than pickin' up
wadded-up napkins with gross stuff inside.

310
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:48,880
Well, then you're hired.

311
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:54,440
Earl, my light.
This is my purpose.

312
00:19:56,080 --> 00:19:58,800
Randy, that's just the sun comin' out
from behind the clouds.

313
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:02,200
And it's doin' it just for me.
How cool is that?

314
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:04,080
[Watch Beeping]

315
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:07,320
Grab her feet.
I'll pry her eyes open.

316
00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:10,200
- Come on, Grandma.
- No!

317
00:20:10,320 --> 00:20:13,640
- You know it's time foryour drops.
- No way! Get off of me!

318
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:16,040
- Just put your head back.
- I don't want them!

998
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:19,800
Montaje: Redención y Jesuscas
Subtítulos: dahhny

999
00:20:21,491 --> 00:20:25,800
.: tusseries & subXpacio :.